Overthinking, but Professionally: Steam, GOG, and Epic (or, Who’s Really on Your Side?)

If you play games on PC, you’ve probably got more than one launcher clogging up your system tray.

Maybe you were once naïve enough to believe Ubisoft Connect would add something to your life; I’m not here to judge. Among this digital clutter, three stores actually matter: Steam, GOG, and the Epic Games Store.

First, the TL;DR—or as I call it, “The Algebra of Access and Aggravation.” I promise, this is only make-believe math:

• Equation 1, “The Gamer’s Refuge”:
  Gamer-friendly Platform = ([Private ownership +] Competition) × Genuine User Focus.
  (See: Steam, GOG, and Epic. Privately owned platforms with healthy competition deliver a faster-growing library replete with backlog guilt.)

• Equation 2, “The Corporate Hellscape”:
  Launcher Frustration = (Public Trading × Publisher Ego) - Competition.
  (See: EA App, Ubisoft Connect, and Battle.net. When public company greed meets bad design, the only thing getting patched out is your will to live.)

• Bonus Equation, “The Bipolar Retailer-Publisher Hybrid”:
  Mixed Experience Platform = Public trading + Retail competition – Publisher monopoly.
  (See, Microsoft Store: not actively hostile, versus Battle.net: a mandatory nightmare. Competitive pressure keeps them from going full Orwell, but at least they let you access your games without a cavity search.)

Now let’s overthink why Steam, GOG, and Epic are (mostly) on your side—or to badly misrepresent Tron, “For the Users!” Let’s also be professional about why publisher launchers are the worst thing since loot boxes, and how—despite exclusives—Epic might actually be on the right side of history.

Steam, GOG, and Epic: The Convenient, the Collector, and the Cash Cannon

We all have those same three fucken launchers, or maybe even four if you were once naïve enough to believe Ubisoft Connect would add anything to your life. Maybe it’s five, because you needed the EA App to unlock the true power of the Force in Jedi Survivor. Hell, let’s go with six, because I know you’re balls-deep in either Diablo, Overwatch, or Hearthstone, and don’t lie to me about Heroes of the Storm—no one plays that anymore.

Among this digital clutter, three matter: Steam, GOG, and the Epic Games Store. Nuclear launch detected from the Steam faithful who hate Epic, but give me a few seconds to justify the throwaway comment before you glass the planet.

Each has strengths:

• Steam is the overlord of catalogue, features, and service,

• GOG is the last bastion of true game ownership, and

• Epic is… well, they’re actually trying to help devs out in ways that aren’t so obvious at the checkout end.

Steam: Hail to the King, Baby

Steam is the de facto home of PC gaming. If a game is launching on PC, it’s probably on Steam—unless the devs hate money. It has everything: a massive library, regular sales, cloud saves, achievements, forums, remote play, modding support, solid refunds, and even a marketplace where digital hats become real cash.

Valve’s secret sauce is ruthless, user-first prioritisation. Gabe Newell famously argued that piracy wasn’t a crime problem but a service problem, and he’s got the money throne to prove his argument. Steam makes gaming so easy you forget your entire library depends on one platform. It’s like renting a flat from a chill landlord who loves your parties, but could drop dead tomorrow, leaving you at the mercy of their heirs.

The Good:

✅ A colossal game library – It’s rare to find a PC game that isn’t on Steam.

✅ Frequent discounts and legendary sales – Even if you don’t need more games, you will buy them.

✅ Steam Workshop and modding support – Mods make everything better (especially Skyrim after you’ve bought it for the seventh time).

✅ Actually useful features – Cloud saves, controller support, in-home streaming, community forums.

The Bad:

❌ You don’t own your games – You’re just renting access from Lord Gaben, although the model lets publishers offer titles they wouldn’t under strict ownership conditions.

❌ Patchy customer support – Good luck getting access to a human if you need one.

❌ 30% revenue cut for developers – Not your direct problem, but it’s why devs are even open to other options.

Steam is best for a seamless, feature-rich experience with a vast library, but it’s worst for people who like actually owning their games.

GOG: Biker Librarians of the Wasteland

GOG was born from CD Projekt’s mission to offer DRM-free gaming in a market plagued by piracy, high prices, and poor distribution. Rising from the ashes of pirated CD-ROMs, GOG became a champion of game preservation and consumer rights. Every game is DRM-free. Once you buy it, it’s yours forever, with no online checks or disappearing licenses. In an industry obsessed with microtransactions and live services, GOG’s commitment to player ownership feels almost radical.

The Good:

✅ DRM-free gaming – Buy a game, download it, keep it forever. Unicorns exist.

✅ Classic games lovingly preserved – Even Planescape: Torment is alive and well here.

✅ Bundled extras – Manuals, soundtracks, concept art… GOG understands nostalgia, but also what we lost when we went digital.

The Bad:

❌ Smaller library – Many modern games skip GOG entirely due to no-DRM phobia.

❌ Less built-in support for mods and communities – No Steam Workshop equivalent.

❌ Occasionally slow patch rollouts – Some games take longer to update here or work erratically.

GOG is best for Game preservationists, DRM-haters, and people who fondly remember physical game manuals. It’s worst for anyone who needs Call of Duty the second it launches.

Epic Games Store: Turning Fortnight Cash Into a Revolution

Epic Games Store wants to be Steam so badly it’s grinding harder than a Returnal player chasing that elusive 100%. Its master plan is to throw cash at developers for exclusivity deals and hand out free games like a guy at a pop-up stall whispering, “Steam sucks.”

Epic’s infamy comes from locking PC games into console-style exclusivity. PCMR gamers now get a taste of the nonsense console players have endured forever. Sometimes, it’s justified. Epic’s deep pockets can fund projects that might flatline otherwise. Other times, it’s just a timed exclusive that annoys gamers who don’t want another launcher or a monopoly on their shopping. And fair enough, too—PC gaming thrives on open communities and choice.

On the plus side, Epic is battling the Witch King of Market Greed. They give devs a bigger sales cut (88/12 vs. Steam’s 70/30), offer much-needed funding, and even have living humans offering customer support. Before Epic, Steam’s only competition was the Windows Store, but Epic’s missing features and obsession with exclusives have made it about as popular as leprosy.

The Good:

✅ Better revenue share for developers – Indie devs actually get paid properly here.

✅ Free games every week – And sometimes they’re bangers like Control or Alan Wake Remastered.

✅ Multiplayer services – Fortnight taught them a thing or two. This stuff is surprisingly robust for online play.

The Bad:

❌ Barebones feature set – While Epic offers free games, no community forum or integrated mod support means you have to rely on external services.

❌ The UI still feels like a beta project – It’s been years, and it’s still clunky.

❌ Exclusive deals are annoying – Buying into relevance hasn’t proven to be a heart-winning strategy.

Epic is best for free games, indie dev support, and Fortnite players. It’s worst for anyone who expects a fully featured gaming platform.

Retailer vs. Publisher Launchers: Joy vs. Greed

Steam, GOG, and Epic exist to sell you games. Their success depends on keeping you happy because you can always buy from someone else. Publisher launchers (EA App, Ubisoft Connect, Battle.net) exist to control how you play and squeeze more money out of you. They answer to shareholders, not players. Sure, they sometimes integrate social features or cross-platform play, but that hardly compensates for the constant upsell and restrictive DRM. It’s like getting a free mint at a fancy restaurant while being paywalled for tap water and access to the toilet.

Retailers focus on making your experience smooth to keep you coming back—no forced ads, endless logins, or DRM nightmares. Epic’s exclusives are annoying, but at least you own your games. Publishers, meanwhile, turn every interaction into an upsell: ads before you play, DRM checks for offline mode, and leftover background processes when you uninstall.

Epic Isn’t Steam, But It’s Not EA Either

Some companies straddle both worlds, like Microsoft with the Xbox Store (retailer) and Battle.net (publisher launcher):

• Buy from the Microsoft Store? Install and play without ever opening it again.

• Buy from Blizzard? Battle.net clings to you like a digital ball and chain.

Retailers compete with sales and convenience. Publishers don’t compete because the alternative is not playing at all.

Monopoly vs. Competition

The Microsoft Store is tolerable because Steam, Epic, and GOG exist. Battle.net, EA App, and Ubisoft Connect? No competition means no mercy. Want Overwatch? Install Battle.net. Assassin’s Creed? Ubisoft Connect is ready to ruin your day.

The Worst-Case Scenario is…

Publisher-retailers selling games with strings attached:

• EA games on Steam still need EA App.

• Ubisoft games on Epic still need Ubisoft Connect.

• Buy Diablo IV anywhere? Battle.net purgatory awaits.

So, What?

Avoid publisher launchers when you can.

• Steam: Convenient, feature-packed, but some DRM.

• GOG: DRM-free, preservation-focused, but a smaller library.

• Epic: Annoying, but still pro-consumer and dev-friendly.

• EA App/Ubisoft Connect/Battle.net: Corporate ransom notes disguised as launchers.

Fewer publisher launchers means better gaming, but that only happens if we vote with our wallets. Choose platforms that respect your time, money, and ownership. Support DRM-free releases and consumer-friendly stores, avoid publisher launchers when you can, and show the industry that player experience and fair treatment of developers matter more than shareholder profits.

Are you a Steam loyalist, a GOG purist, or an Epic free-game hoarder? Are these trade-offs worth it, or is your gaming life in need of a platform overhaul? Drop a comment/reply with your take. And if you’re still buying directly from EA or Ubisoft, blink twice if you need help.

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